I read the Royce Reed blog on VH1.com the other day and it inspired something in me. I totally respect her for speaking her mind and telling it like it is from her perspective. She is definitely a little firecracker! A real spitfire that will stand up for what she believes is right. Now we all have that side of us, that moment when we just right up in the middle of things and Royce is no exception…she will definitely be “right dead smack” in the middle of things this season LOL. You can love her or hate her, but for the most part, what you see is what you get. You can NOT base your opinion of a person by viewing one snapshot of their lives.
This leads me to…I did just that! I watched the first season of the show and had so many preconceived notions about this girl that I felt I wouldn’t like her. The portrayal of her that I saw took me back to a very painful time with my ex-husband. Hell, what they showed last season, I felt she represented the “type” of girl that he cheated on me with. Boy, there is truth to the saying, “You can not judge a book by the cover.” I do not want to give to much away because there are a lot of twists and turns this season, but I was wrong, WRONG on so many levels.
In any event, it was not her conversations on this last episode that caught my attention. I felt that she was basically saying, with regard to me…that we all have our moments. No one person is without a time in their life when they acted inappropriately. For me in that moment, I do not regret what I said, I do feel embarrassed about where it all played out. Such a public forum, a charity event for pete sake. What was I thinking…that is the point, I was not thinking!
Anyway, the main thing that caught my attention was her final statement, “You can not take s*it with you, but your legacy. What will you leave behind”? That’s really deep when you think about it. What will your legacy be when you are dead and gone? I have had several people ask me if I felt I represented myself well to my daughters with my actions. To this I say…
I sat my daughters down and apologized . Honestly, the drink hit me all at once and I had no control. Literally I drank 2 drinks, but for a non drinker, those were far too strong for my system. My bad. However, I also had to make them aware that although it looked a little crazy, I was standing up for our family. I want them to know that under no circumstances should they allow anyone to belittle them, disrespect them or degrade their character. They are to be strong women and tackle any obstacles that may come their way. They must protect themselves and stand up for what they know to be right. Sometimes those discussions are not going to happen in the most convenient place, but they DO need to happen. Never back down from any situation and be willing to suffer the repercussions of your actions.
I acknowledge that being tipsy did not help matters with the incident and that is the only aspect that I apologize for in this matter. I do NOT apologize for what was said – I have at every waking moment tried to be an example for my daughters. I have tried to guide them and counsel them to the best of my ability. For most of their lives, they have always seen me exude strength and bounce back from things that have knocked me down.
Abuse me…I am stepping off/do not pay your child support….I will sell all I have to take care of my daughters/ fall on hardship…I am asking for help/make improper financial decisions…I am getting a job to make it better and recover/ made mistakes…I will tell the masses and use my life as a living testimony.
I am no saint – I represent YOU-the everyday person that is out here grinding on a day to day basis. . YES, I am just like you…LOOK… I make mistakes – I yell, I fell on hardship, I work 9-5, I am a single mom, I shop at Target, I am going thru ups and downs with my kids father, I am trying to find love, I am holding on to the relationship that I have now with all that I have to make it work, I want to be hugged, I need friends, I had a drink, I argue with my mother, I curse (on occasion), I smoked cigarettes, I discipline my children, I help people when I can… I am sentenced to life without parole just like everyone else LOL. You can not run from life, you can only live it to the best of your ability and hopefully you learn and grow along the way.
That is my legacy – a legacy of TRUTH, PURPOSE, ENCOURAGEMENT, LOVE, and EXCELLENCE. I am damn proud of the person who went through trials and tribulations because it made me stronger. It made me the person that I am today. Since obstacles are never-ending in this thing called life, I am sure I will be faced with more ups and downs –thus I will continue to grow and learn. Although, in each moment of my life, I will continue to be an example of strength and humility to my daughters, always having faith to come out on the other side…still standing. I am proud of my legacy!